I have many fears, from needles to spiders and pretty much anything creepy and crawly, but water has never been one of them. Since I was a kid, I have been prancing around in pools, holding my breath, racing my friends, playing games and fetching golf balls whenever they were thrown. A large portion of my childhood was spent in the pool. Surprisingly little time was spent in the ocean considering that I grew up in Cape Town, but hey... the water was freezing and my mother was never fond of the sand. Still, I enjoyed swimming and enjoyed the beach whenever I had a chance to go to it. And yet, the idea of taking a dive course never crossed my mind.
Cue my university years spent studying, partying and, when possible, soaking up the sunshine. My love of swimming never faded and, despite dating a diver, doing a dive course still never struck me as an option. Each year, his birthday presents consisted of some form of dive gear (a BCD here, a weight belt there) and he would come back from trips with his family sunburnt and thrilled at the experiences he'd had. Nope, I still wasn't interested. And then, six years later, when planning our first real vacation away together, I started to consider the possibility. It wasn't an easy one to consider. Sure, I had never been scared of water, but the idea of breathing underwater still made me a little nervous. But we planned the trip to include some diving and I got going on my course mid-March.
First there were the lessons - the lectures, the reading and the knowledge reviews. These I sped through, trying my best to retain the knowledge contained within them. Words like neutral buoyancy and reverse squeezes floated through my brain and stuck there. The dive course book was extensive, but filled with fairly simple rules. Stay calm, breathe, don't hold your breath, breathe, look after your gear, breathe. It taught us the basics of how to dive without actually sending us underwater.
Then came the confined water sessions. This was it, the part that I had been both dreading and looking forward to all at the same time. Before we could start diving, we had to do some fitness tests. Fitness had never been my friend. I loved swimming, but lacked speed. We were given a choice - 8 laps in the University pool without a mask and fins, or 12 laps with them. Not one for holding my breath for long periods of time, I elected to swim with the mask and fins. Of course, I hadn't expected it would take so long getting them on! By the time they were on, some of the others were finishing their laps. By the time I finished mine and went to wade water for 10 minutes, there were only 3 people left wading. Ten minutes passed and I passed my fitness test, albeit slowly. Then it was time to gear up. This I was quick with. Having studied hard, I knew just what to do and managed first time without any trouble. Then it was time to get the gear on.
I was lucky with my gear. As my birthday present, Grant had bought me almost everything that I would need - wetsuit, booties, fins, mask and weight belt. The weight belt was the only part that I hadn't tried on, and the instructor assured me that I would only need six weights to go down. Unfortunately, my instructor was wrong. Everyone climbed into the pool, myself included (now caught up to the rest) and we started going down in pairs. Only, I wouldn't go down. I was positively buoyant and there was nothing I could do but get out and put more weights on while the others finished their first set of skills.
Already behind and feeling terrible about it, when it came to my turn, I was far from reassured about my abilities. I went under, with a little more shifting of weights, and started the skills. But as soon as I got one wrong, I panicked. What was that first rule that we learned about in the books? Keep calm. But no matter how much I tried to remind myself of that, I just kept panicking, which only made things worse. Eventually, I had to call it quits and decide to come back the next day and try again. Sure enough, the next day, I managed the skill that I had struggled with the first time (removing my regulator, retrieving it and breathing from it) without any difficulty. Perfect. Now for the rest of the tasks. Next came removing my mask, putting it back on and clearing it. Alas, another difficulty. No matter how hard I tried, the panic just kept taking over and my mind kept stopping me from completing the tasks in front of me. Without managing the skill, there was nothing for it but to leave for the day and come back later.
Thankfully, it was not only my lack of skills that stopped me from finishing the course. The weather decided to join me in my misery by stopping everyone else from finishing theirs too. It meant that the weekend that was supposed to involve open water diving ended up involving me in the pool with the instructor once again. We practiced and practiced until there were only 3 skills left unmastered. And then the weather gave out once again. Apparently timing was never on my side.
And so, here I am, three skills (controlled emergency swimming ascent, underwater weight remove/replace and underwater gear remove/replace) and two open water dives short of a PADI Open Water course and with a diving holiday practically booked for the end of the month, before I can finish the necessary dives. And you may be wondering why I am writing this now. Well... any instructors out there willing to take me on (with all of my mental issues)?
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