November: Part 1

If someone were to ask me to describe my last few weeks (go ahead… ASK!) the first word that comes to mind would be RIDICULOUS. And I do not mean that in a bad way. It has been ridiculously busy, but also ridiculously fun, exciting and simply breathtaking. So much so, that I do not have the breathe to explain it all in one post.

How about we start from the beginning? The first weekend of November was an incredibly busy one, but in the best way possible. The Saturday was spent taking photos for the Rhodes Chamber Choir (the people who have kept my photography going throughout the year) in my studio. I really enjoy spending time with people in my studio, so it made for a fun afternoon with lots of laughter. The photos were being taken for adverts that will be used to find new choir members next year, and they had a mugshot theme. This meant a lot of fun for the people involved, and a lot of post-production to make the white background seem a little more like a police station. You can check out the results on my photography blog.

Sunday saw more time spent with my camera as Lwando and his girlfriend, Nonkosazana, who was down from East London for the weekend. A new challenge faced me as I have never had a couple session in my studio, and found it a lot more difficult to co-ordinate while trying to stop the shadows from the lighting getting in the way. After half an hour in the studio, and around 40 photographs to work with, it was out into the sunshine as we made our way to the Botanical Gardens. It was the perfect day to walk around, and I took them to the spots that I am used to being the small bamboo jungle, the romantic pond and the river. From being hyper-aware of the camera in the beginning, the two started relaxing more, posing easier and just have fun. Have a look at the photos that came out of the session on my photography blog.

With the weekend out of the way, it was back to work for a slightly shorter week than normal. Grant’s dad and stepmom came down on Wednesday in preparation for our roadtrip on Thursday, and they came bearing many a gift. Having just moved into a new house in Johannesburg, they had a lot of extra bits and bobs that they didn’t need any more and decided to bring down to their incredibly grateful (step-)son and his girlfriend! This included an extra fridge, a gas braai and a tortoise named Tommy, Grant’s childhood pet.

The new house in Johannesburg doesn’t have a big garden (hardly any garden at all, in fact), so it was decided that Tommy would be far happier in our backyard nomming on the fruit as it falls (because we are entirely useless at picking it) and having a Puddims to play with. For the first few days, Tommy was entirely unimpressed with his new situation, hissing and spitting and threatening to chew on any hand that got near him (though for a toothless animal, his beak certainly does pack a punch). But he seems to have come around to it with the help of some tomatoes, apples, strawberries and cuttlefish. He is undergoing an entirely new diet regiment consisting of less veggies and fruit, because apparently tortoises struggle to process sugar, but more hay. Which he seems entirely unimpressed with. But we keep trying regardless!

The view of Robberg Beach in Plett.

The view of Knysna Quays.

Grant and I jetted off on Thursday, leaving Jono to look after the new addition to our family, and made our way to George for a long weekend away, stopping off in Plett for a night on the way to visit family friends and just rest considering that Grant and I only managed to leave Grahamstown close to 6pm. The Plett leg of the trip was very short and not particularly eventful, being only one night, but from there Sharon and I made our way to Knysna for the day on Friday while the boys carried on to George for their first day of golf. Knysna meant shopping and time spent by the seaside, which was greatly appreciated by me, and it was a lovely, relaxing day spent wandering from shop to shop, without buying too much to Grant’s relief.

Sunrise from one of our balconies. To the far right, you can see our lounge and further in our bedroom.

From Knysna, Sharon and I slowly made our way to the hotel in George and, oh my, what a hotel. The Hyatt Regency in George is absolutely stunning, and Grant and I were incredibly, incredibly lucky because Grant’s dad decided that, because it was Grant’s birthday weekend, we would get the bigger suite. Which just happened to be the presidential one!! The hostess seemed just as shocked as I was, but managed to keep her composure for long enough to hand me the key to the room and keep herself from gawking as Sharon and I made our way to the elevator. When I returned with Grant later in the evening though, we caught her whispering to a colleague and pointing in our direction, which we found to be hilarious rather than offensive. We were just as surprised as she was at the luxury we had been provided.

Sun setting over the Hyatt Regency.

The room itself was bigger than our entirely three bedroomed, two bathroomed house. With a lavish lounge, an office area (as part of the lounge), a dining room, a kitchen, two bathrooms, a giant bedroom and three balconies (all with amazing views, of course), we were set to never have to leave the room again. But then, there were others things to coax us out and convince us that we were still in the real world with shopping downstairs, an infinity pool, a spa and the Ernie Els designed Oubaai golf course all being part of the resort. Grant and Rob made full use of the golf course, while Sharon and I perused the shops and the local area, stopping into Heralds Bay for lunch on Saturday and sitting by the pool with the boys for the rest of the afternoon. The breakfast that the hotel provided was also phenomenal and out of this world, but unfortunately I only got to make use of the restaurant for the breakfasts. On Saturday evening I started feeling completely out of it, losing feeling in my arm and feeling disoriented and nauseous. After taking a few pills, I was out like a light and only managed to wake up for a few minutes to grab a bite of the divine grilled chicken that had been ordered from room service as part of the dinner. I got told the next morning how the meals that Grant, Rob and Sharon had ordered (also through room service) came on silver platters. The next morning, we were slow to wake and reluctant to leave, but were out of the hotel and back on the road by midday, stopping briefly to grab a token or two and some lunch on the way back to Grahamstown.

The view on the way back into Grahamstown

And thus ends part one of November thus far. Watch this space for part 2.

Self=image

Self-image is not an easy topic for me to discuss, but it is one that I have been faced with a lot recently. I have been bombarded with news articles about it and faced with it whenever I look in the mirror.

I have always had weight problems. At first, when I was young, I was significantly underweight. I was accused by classmates and teachers of being anorexic, and my parents seemed to feel the same way to some extent. I had no appetite, and the small amount of food that I did eat they tended to encourage. Nevermind the fact that it was terribly bad for me, as long as I was eating, it was fine.

Then, when I hit my teenage years and my appetite started to grow along with my figure, at first it was a relief. The change happened to come at the same time as a change in school, and the feeling was that the weight-gain came from somewhere in between happiness at my new surroundings and just growing up in general. My metabolism was changing, and at first it was seen as a good thing. A great thing in fact! I remember bragging to my sister that I had finally put on weight, and she didn't believe me! And putting on weight was something to brag about at that stage. It meant that I was getting healthy. It meant, in my mind, no more mocking and no more accusations.

What I didn't realise at that point was that the weight gain was not all going to be good. While eating whatever I wanted was fine when I was eating hardly anything at all, the weight gain meant that eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted should have been off the cards. And yet, I had grown so used to eating whatever I pleased that dieting was not something that formed a part of my vocabulary. I had grown used to eating meals that were not necessarily good for me, and succumbing to any cravings that I had. I would not let my body hold me back from what I wanted, under the impression that I would rather be over-weight and happy than under-weight and unhappy.

And I think this is where the biggest problem came in. I had started associating my weight with my emotions. The times in my life when I had been at my lowest weight were also the times when I was at my lowest emotionally. I wanted to avoid that at all costs, and food became a means of reaching this end.

It is now many years later, and my weight is a rollercoaster. I have hypo-thyroidism, which does not help (and nor does my phobia of needles for getting my thyroid checked regularly), but my diet is still all over the place. I am a stress-eater, and I consider my job to be stressful. I am not a smoker, I am not a huge coffee drinker, and this means that when I stress, I use food to cope, and I eat badly.

I look in the mirror and I often wonder how I got to be this way. I try to lose weight, but as soon as an obstacle comes along, I tend to falter in its path. I think part of the problem is that I have a low self-image. While Grant can look at me and say that I am sexy, I look at myself and do not feel it. And I don't think that is something that is going to be shed with weight-loss. When I was overseas and had lost over 10kg in weight over a matter  of months, I still felt over-weight, I still felt like it was not good enough. And when you have that mindset, no amount of weight is ever going to be good enough. At that point,  you have to take a deeper look at yourself and wonder whether your weight-loss or -gain is the real aim, or is there something else about yourself that needs to change - whether it be  your attitude, your lifestyle or your way of coping with things.

To me, I think that I could do with a change in all aspects. I have a very negative way of looking at the world, I live a lazy lifestyle and I do not cope with stress well (screaming and eating being only two of the signs that I am having a bad day) and those are things that are not going to fix themselves with weight-loss. Those are things that may lead to me being happier as a person and happier with myself, and I think that is a good start on the way to having both a healthy body and a healthy mind.

Religious Issues

My friend, Amy, wrote a blogpost this morning that struck a chord. She wrote a post about how much it bugs her when, in times of difficulty, people respond by offering to pray for her. As an atheist, she finds this borderline offensive. But I am not going to put words in her mouth. If you would like to hear what Amy has to say on the matter, you are welcome to read the post itself.

What I am more interested in talking about is the chord that religion has struck with me lately. It comes in the form of a client. Now, I know that legally and ethically I cannot talk about our clients, but this is less about his problems and more about an attitude that I find highly annoying in certain religious people in general. Back in the days when Gina and I were in high school, there was a boy that Gina liked and, to avoid awkwardness while talking about him and, well, because he had many, we ended up calling him Issues. I would like to refer to this client in the same way. He will henceforth be known as Issues.

Issues had a problem with an invoice that he was sent this month. After two or three emails explaining the situation to him, I received an email back where he suddenly announced that he was a deeper meaning Christian. What he meant by that is that he is not someone who goes to Church often, but someone who believes in God and lives their life according to God's word. Which is just great for him! He is welcome to do that and I am very happy that he has found something meaningful in his life! But what does that have to do with the matter at hand?

I ignored the religious aspect and continued as I had been going, attempting to explain to him the situation and hoping that he would understand logic. His next email explained that he is only accountable to the Lord, his saviour, Jesus Christ. Actually, Issues, no. You are also accountable to the law. But no matter. I continued once again to try and bring the conversation back to the matter at hand, his invoice. I tried to explain that this had nothing to do with who he is accountable to in the long run, but that he is also responsible for his actions now.

Alas, his next email explained that he only serves God and that only God could vindicate him when the time was right. By this point, I was furious and frustrated that no matter how simply I explained the situation, he always reverted back to God and ignored anything that I had said as though it made no difference to his life because he was religious. He acted as though, by being religious, he was completely superior to anyone else and no mortal problems could affect him. Pay a bill? Pfft! God will see me  through! God will pay it for me, or God will deal with the consequences of my own actions.

All this time, he kept repeating that I had to respect his choices in lifestyle and religion. Which I accept. I do respect peoples choices. But that does not mean that they can get off scott-free. People need to accept that their choices have consequences. And that life choices play no part in business. That you choose to follow a religion does not influence the way that your ISP will treat you. You do not deserve better or worse treatment than anyone else. Your choices (aside from perhaps choices in packages) should not affect your invoice. One cannot live their life however they like without consequences and cannot get away with not paying for services that they have requested and that we have paid for on our part.

As a company, we implement some rules (like clients having to pay by the 10th of the month), but we also have rules implemented on us (like domains being automatically renewed) that we need to come to terms with and pass on to the clients. Do you see us complaining about our God-given rights? No. Because God-given rights do not come into it. Rights that the law gives us come into it. Rights that the constitution gives us. And if our services were unconstitutional, if they were unequal or unfair, then I can start to understand. But this is a case where it has nothing to do with bias due to religion or belief. God does not come into it at all.

It is business, plain and simple. And the sooner some people can understand that, the easier life will be.

/Rant.

November Life

So as many of you may have noticed, I have been quite quiet recently. This is because, as I suspected would happen, I have been crazy busy! But, there are a couple of aspects to this busyness that I had not expected.

So Lara, what have you been doing?

There have been three things taking up most of my time over the last month. The most obvious one is work, and the less obvious are writing and photography. I have stuck to my NaNoWriMo plans, and am 33240 words into my novel. I still have 8 days left to write, and I think that I can make it if I buck up and start writing a little more than 2000 words each day. Which is totally possible, considering that I got to 25k by the 10^th of the month and have just been slacking since then.

In terms of photography, I have been participating in a mentorship programme as the mentee. My mentor is a Photography professor in the States, and I have been chatting with him over Skype 3 days of the week. I am given assignments to do and am learning how to use PhotoShop, and the experience has been great (Sausi, my tutor, is AWESOME), but it is also extremely tiring and leaves little time for other things, like writing.

Oh, and I have been packing. Not as much as I should be since I have had other things taking up my time on the weekends that I plan to pack (things like photo shoots or trips to PE or no packing tape being in the house). But there are a good number of boxes taking up the area under the stairs and we intend to move a lot of them to the new house this weekend. The move really is around the corner and it is uber-exciting, especially since I GET A PHOTOGRAPHY STUDIO IN MY GARAGE! Plus, two giant gardens, plus a house-warming party where people bring gifts and things. Can you tell how excited I am? I don’t think you can. SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!

What have you been reading?

Oh yeah, I haven’t given up on reading completely. Though most of my books have, at this point, been packed into boxes, I left one out for my reading pleasure, and that one is the book that I recently received from Loot – “The Gospel According to Jesus Christ” by Jose Saramago. I first heard of the book when I was doing my post-grad diploma and have been intrigued and wanting to read it since then. Unfortunately, it is not the most popular of Saramago’s work and has proved difficult to come across. But I found it on Loot and ordered it a couple of weeks ago. It arrived last week and I have been reading it (slowly but surely) since. It is definitely interesting, but not the easiest read. I will let you know what I think of it when I’ve finished, which will not be this month considering everything else that is going on.

What have you been watching?

Not very much – one movie and a couple of series when I am going to bed at night. The movie that I watched was Easy A, which I LOVED and will be writing a review of later this week (probably). The series that I have been watching are Dollhouse (I didn’t get into it when it started, but am loving it now) Misfits (during my lunch breaks at work – another review around the corner) and Castle (uber-awesome!)

What about that uber-awesome cat of yours with the incredibly lame name?

Oy! No being mean to Puddims L He’ll totally kick your ass! He is a superhero after all! He has been saving me from 8-legged monsters left, right and centre, occasionally jumping on my head at 4am to do so and attempting to do the same to Grant (though I stopped him). He is also LOVING the boxes that are around the house and thinks that they are there just for him. I think he is not going to be such a happy kitty in 9 days time, however, when he finds himself in unfamiliar surroundings. But there will be boxes (and spiders I’m sure) to keep him company, so he will survive.

And so my life over the last few weeks has pretty much been explained. What’s going on in your lives?

Welcome

Welcome to my new blog!

Let me introduce myself and explain why I have started this. First of all, my name is Lara. I am 22 years old and have recently returned to South Africa from a sojourn in South Korea where I taught English for a year. Let me say this from the start, however: I AM NOT A TEACHER. I wasn't before I went to Korea and I would never like to be one again. If my year of teaching taught me one thing, it is that.

Now I suppose I should explain why I started this blog. I tried to get a number of blogs off the ground in the past and none of them succeeded until I started Travellin' Thru Korea. The reason why I think it worked so well is because I had people who were interested in hearing about my journey and pushed me to work at it. When my time in Korea started drawing to a close, I started wondering whether it would be worthwhile carrying on. And then I had a chat with my friend Nikita, who insisted that I should keep writing because she had finally found a blog that she enjoyed reading and she didn't want to give it up. And what was I to call it? What was it going to be about? Why would people want to read it?

Well, as my friend Shaina explained to me, it was the life experience that drew her to my blog in the first place and it was these life experiences that kept her there. Just because I'm not in Korea doesn't mean that my life is going to become boring. Just because I have lived in South Africa all my life doesn't mean that I can't look at South Africa with the eyes of a new-comer, and nor does it mean that my life here wouldn't be worth noting. And so, this blog is going to be about my life experiences as a 22 year old experiencing life the only way she knows how. Expect to see book reviews, food reviews, restaurant reviews and just the details of my life strewn across the interwebs for all to see - or at least for all those who would be interested.

I hope you stick around to enjoy the show!